A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, there were days when the way to satisfy your throbbing downstairs neighbor was by introducing him to the powerful duo: a bathroom towel and your trusty hand. Either that or getting the deflated long-forgotten dummy that is in your closet. Or maybe under your bed, I don’t judge!
At some point, you’ve probably lost hope and thought, “Well, if I can’t shoot in the goal I want, I guess this will just have to do the job.” Don’t think that you’re the only one – I’ve thought the same thing – more or less! But that was until I found this perfect little invention – fleshlights!
I will be honest and tell you that I’ve stuck my manhood in a fair share of holes in my life – yes, I’m talking about vaginas, buttholes, and a number of blowjobs that are best not mentioned. However, being someone who prefers going in through the back door, I was over the moon when introduced to the anal fleshlights.
I know you may be a little sceptical – so was I at first – but that is why I am here to give you an honest review on anal fleshlights and get you the best one money can buy. Feeling extremely close – if not the same – to an actual anus and with a long list of choices that have different designs and features, anyone can use these toys, regardless of your sexual orientation.
Thus, if you feel like giving this ride a go, let an anal sex expert help you get the best out of it!
Have You Heard About Anal Fleshlights?
Let’s clear the fog around fleshlights because when I did my first search, I was as confused as you are right now – an endless amount of names that mean nothing to a newbie.
The first time I read the name, I thought, “Flashlight?” and boy was I close. This sex toy literally looks like a flashlight. But the insides… It’s like opening presents on Christmas – wrapped perfectly, and when you get to the real prize, your heart leaps from joy.
The name tells you everything you need to know about them. Flesh, for the life-like material inside + the flashlight shape of the case. How simple! These portable sex toys can resemble a mouth, vagina, or asshole, essentially allowing you to masturbate anytime and anywhere until your brain can’t function – or until you feel satiated; it’s all up to you.
Now back to our topic. Do you fantasize about fucking your partner from behind until they scream your name and beg you for that sweet release, but they are not by your side to comfort the saluting solder that is building a tent out of your trousers? At ease, soldier! Here is the solution to your problem.
Designed in the late 20th century, anal fleshings are rising in popularity on the market nowadays. Their anus-looking shape and the life-like feeling of the inner sleeve are what draw more customers to them. On the outside, they look like a simple flashlight constructed from ABS plastic, making it perfect for hiding it from prying eyes.
However, the inside is what makes it fun for us. The sleeve is made from flexible silicone that slides inside the case. And let me tell you about the best part. Just like your partner or favorite porn star – again, whatever butters your gears – it has a specifically textured canal and tight opening that would make you count stars during your masturbation.
Do you think that your lower taste buds are picky and looking for something that might be hard to find? Anal fleshlights can have different textures, shapes and even come in various colors. Moreover, if this doesn’t suit your needs, some companies let you customize your new best friend.
By now, I have tried a decent amount of these bad boys, and the choice is really hard. However, after thinking long and hard – yes, the pun was intended – I think I’ve made the ultimate list of best rectal fleshlights available today. Hop on the ride!
The Ultimate List Presents: Best Anal Fleshlights
Riley Reid Euphoria – All-Time Best Seller
- Insertable Length: 9’’
- Width: 0.5’’ – 1.2’’
- Pros: Unique texture; Mindboggling orgasms
- Cons: Not realistic enough
It’s no wonder this anal fleshlight is the all-time best seller. Molded by the perfect curves of Riley Reid – I’m sure you already are familiar with the name – this is the ideal cuddler for your penis. I have yet to see someone say bad things about this toy.
Push through the tight hole, and you will be greeted with more pleasure than anything you have ever experienced. Enveloped by a patented superskin material with squares, circles, pyramid-looking bumps, and other shapes, the insides of it will show you the real meaning of euphoria.
On top of all, the four chambers might get you to the end faster than you’re expecting. But if the ride is mindblowing, do we really mind it? It might be a bit on the pricy side, but since pleasure is what you’re looking for, I’m saying go for it!
Stoya Destroya Epic – Best For Power Hungry Guys
- Insertable Length: 9’’
- Width: 0.6’’ – 1.8’’
- Pros: Adjustable to your speed; Suction cup included
- Cons: Not suitable for every size
Based on another well-known name on the market, this fleshlight will shatter your world to bits and pieces. Slowly entering the hole, you’ll be welcomed with round ridges that are perfectly placed to touch every part of your penis.
Further down, there are more sections with a variety of shapes waiting for you, each milking you out to the last drop. The more you thrust, the higher the pleasure. The natural superskin material gives the challenge to slide down to the end and experience maximum eyes-going-to-the-back-of-your-head orgasm. Epic indeed!
Need more? The additional attachments to this gadget allow you to run this marathon hands-free. Expensive, but it has it all.
Thrust hard and let the crazy ride begin!
Lada Rhoades Karma – Best Reality Checker
- Insertable Length: 8.5’’
- Width: 0.8’’ – 1.8’’
- Pros: Tight entrance; Good suction
- Cons: One pattern of texture
Karma – you get what you deserve. Well, if this is what karma looks like, then sign me up!
With an amazingly tight entrance, this fleshlight really gives the feeling of entering a real ass, making you doubt and check reality. On top of this, the ridges and bumps follow one pattern with just one difference – getting tighter around your dick! You can’t tell me you don’t want that.
Many might turn their backs on this product when they see the price, but trust me when I tell you, this fellow will wrap all-around your length and bring it into a warm hug – one that ends with a happy ending.
Moreover, the strong suction on this one rivals the real deal. Close your eyes and see if you can tell me the difference!
Brandi Love Shameless – Best For Texture
- Insertable Length: 9’’
- Width: 0.5’’ – 1.9’’
- Pros: Multiple patterns
- Cons: Hard to clean
When they told me that texture is important, I didn’t believe it until I tried this one right here. With 3 chambers of patterns, Shameless deserves its name.
Once you get through the anal barrier, you will first feel a little bumpy road, but then…Heaven! With intersected geometrical patterns, this anal fleshlight will massage you until completion. The stimulation is so high that it will milk every single drop of you.
GO Jolt Butt – Best Travel Companion
- Total Length: 8.5’’
- Insertable Length: 7’’
- Pros: Compact and ergonomic design;
- Cons: Too simple; One pattern
If you are constantly on the road or just want to hide your fleshlight easier, then this is the right choice for you!
Go Jolt Butt might be smaller than the rest on this list, but it can sure rival them. Moreover, it’s great for guys that get easily overstimulated. The one ribbed pattern in the sleeve works wonders on your throbbing length.
Joey Mills Electric – Best For Gay Men
- Total Length: 9.75’’
- Insertable Length: 8.5’’
- Pros: Unique, intense texture; Matte finish when dried
- Cons: Takes longer to dry
Thrill-seekers rejoice – Electric is on the market!
With a tight entrance and a wavy pattern filled with bumps, this sleeve will snug your shaft just the right way. The design is specifically made for you to feel electricity running through your hard-on just by entering it. From that point onward, it just keeps getting better.
And the best part is that you can easily clean it up.
Griffin Barrows Cake – Best For Tops
- Total Length: 9.75’’
- Insertable Length: 9’’
- Pros: Excellent suction
- Cons: Only one pattern
If you’re the top or versatile one in your relationship, this is the right choice for you!
Sculpted by one of porn’s hottest power bottoms, this fleshlight will squeeze the living soul out of you. With an anal lane filled with bumps of all sizes, you can say ta-ta to your search for real anal pleasure.
Although expensive, Cake gives you the recreation of real topping!
A Buying Guide For Anal Fleshlights – Everything You Need To Know And More
As you can see, there is a huge amount of anal fleshlights out there. You can get lost digging around, especially if you don’t know what you’re looking for. Practically every kind of this sex toy will look alluring to you, and like a succubus, will draw you in with flashy pictures and deals.
Don’t fall for it!
When you decide that it’s time to get an anal fleshlight, you need to consider a few things. Especially if you are new to this world, jumping right to it might cost you dearly. That is why I have extracted these few tips to help you in your search.
The World Of Textures
This is a tough question. Like everything else in life, this too comes down to preferences and your ultimate aim. Do you want it to feel like you’re really entering your partner? Or maybe you want this to be something opposite of them.
Welcome to the endless well of options! But be careful when searching – you can lose yourself easily down this path.
Nonetheless, my suggestion is first to check out the types of textures. Honestly, every possible texture known to mankind is available. Regardless if you like bigger bumps, smaller ridges, no ridges at all, a canal with different shapes to awaken your fantasies, or something entirely different, I guarantee you will find it.
Your Toys Must Always Be Clean
This is the ultimate rule for any sex toy, so yes, it absolutely applies here. Because of the real-feel material, this sex toy is perfect for breeding bacterias if you don’t take care of it. Besides, the chances that this cum collector enchants you and pulls you into a different magical world are huge, and you do not want to bathe in the same murky waters, now do you?
That is why cleaning your anal fleshlight is a must!
While on the hunt for the best anal fleshlight, you have to consider this feature. However, it gets a little tricky. Most of these require air drying and if you don’t live by yourself – well this could get awkward. But calm your horses, I have a solution for this too. Considering that you can’t rinse this toy with soap because of its design and material, the next best solution is to use warm water.
Be sure to thoroughly wash the inside and outside of the case and sleeve – every single part! Flip it a few times and get in there real good. And when you finish with this, then comes the drying.
If you can leave it to air dry for a whole day, this would be the best option. But there are other solutions for you to deal with this problem. How about hanging it in your closet or somewhere discrete? Or grab a towel and a pipe cleaner, and swab the insides as if your life depends on it. Make sure not to store it wet, as you’ll just end up with a mouldy toy that’s of no use anymore.
Clean toy = happy boy!
Legit Websites Where You Can Get The Anal Fleshlight Of Your Dreams
If you have decided to spend your money on this, you have to check where to get it from first.
The best way is, of course, the official websites. They are always higher in price, but they are also the safest. However, you might be lucky and stumble on some discount offers from them. Plus, some sites give out coupons to first-time purchasers. And if you hit that money limit, you can even get free right-to-your-doorstep shipping.
If maybe the official website digs a huge hole in your pocket, then go for the certified sellers. Nowadays there are tons of them, but I suggest you go for the ones you are familiar with and can be sure that will deliver. This way, you can save some money and get your hands on this sex toy.
Lastly, always be on the lookout for drop shippers. Although legal, this is one of the best ways to scam customers and is highly active in the sex toy industry. Some certified sellers, like Amazon, allow drop shipping, but they do have rules you need to abide by. That is why, if you see an offer that looks too good to be true, chances are it really is!
What To Do If You Are Not Satisfied With The Product
What we all want from the product we have bought is to function the way it says it will. However – and it is heart-wrenching to say this – sometimes we are just not that lucky. Thus, I always check the return policy before purchasing.
This is where buying from the official websites comes in handy. How would a bad review on their product, plastered on their website, look? Plus, you might be able to negotiate your way out of this little mess.
Needless to say, you try it, you buy it! Inspect your bundle of pleasure before you start using it.
Drum Roll Please: Verdict on Anal Fleshlights
Here is where our journey ends. As you have seen, this world is like Alice’s rabbit hole – you never know where you’re going to end up next, but you will love every single second of it.
I know that the options are endless and that you might be worried that you’re going to make a mistake, but forget all that. If you’re a first-time shopper, everything you need to know is right here. My holy grail is Riley’s, and that is why I have it listed as the top choice. However, any one of the gadgets above that you pick is going to be an excellent choice.
For the more experienced users, this fine print can help you raise your game. Finally, be sure to always read the instructions and take care of your cum dispenser. You don’t want to spend money on a new one – even though adding to your collection once in a while sounds pretty good to me!
In conclusion, listen to your genie and find the best way to rub it out of the lamp!